Sunday June 1st I completed the Jugo Juice 10 K race at the Calgary Marathon in a time of 1 hour, 10 mins, 47 seconds unofficially at the moment.
The moment I crossed the finish line I finally became my own inspiration and my own hero.
Why do I say this ? Because I became a firsthand witness to all it took to get there, to take the first steps and fight back on the hard days. There were definitely hard days. So. Many. Hard. Days.
Is it narcissistic of me? Maybe. But not really. I rarely toot my own horn.
Most people I know have people who they look up to for inspiration. It could be an actor, athlete a friend or family member. I too have had past inspirational people I have looked up to. But I wonder why can’t someone be their own inspiration ?
The answer: because we focus on what’s wrong with us or are ashamed of our stories to really inspire ourselves. We are afraid of Judgement, ridicule. We pick at the lack of success or the body parts we hate or the last 10 lbs. We do not realize how great we really are or even how others may see us.
I am willing to bet you have at least one person who you have inspired. Think about it, you may realize by someone’s actions that it was you who helped them make that change or take that step. Now…look in the mirror and realize that you can and have it in you to inspire yourself to new levels. Stop worrying about what others think of your story, you may be surprised at the support you get.
I use to hate when people said I inspire them, I was uncomfortable, uneasy. Who am I to inspire? I thought I was a complete screw up. A life screw up. I focused on my bad decisions, the failures. I hated my so called lot in life for so long. Not anymore.
Then I had a Heart Attack. It was the best thing that could have happened. Truth.
It wasn’t until after that I really started seeing my own self worth and yes even why some people said to me that they are inspired by me…..even long before this Heart Attack.
Through months of rehab, to making better lifestyle choices and never giving up and realizing the sweat and pain was going to get me somewhere, I took the step to the start line of the 10 K.
My friend Sam ran this race with me and I met up with 2 other Cardiac Rehab graduates before the race. 15,000 people took a step that day, that is a huge accomplishment in itself.
The race wasn’t easy but wasn’t hard either. It was amazing for me, exhilarating, fun. I spent the previous week being nervous. Could I do it ? Would my heart hold up ? Was my training adequate ?
Yes, Yes and Yes.
As each step brought me closer to the finish line I smiled knowing that all I have been through made it all worth it.
As I crossed the finish line I realized for the first time, that all along as I was looking around for inspiration to get better, to be healthy and take steps forward in my life but it took finishing that race to realize……I had it in me the entire time. My own will to succeed, my determination and my attitude of never give up.
I will still get uneasy when people tell me I inspire them, for I don’t do well with compliments and I am just simply a man trying to live as best I can for as long I can.
I will smile knowing that as long as I keep inspiring myself then maybe, just maybe I can be an inspiration to others.
June 1, 2014, I became my own hero. My own Inspiration. Friends, YOU have this inside you, just look a little deeper when you look in that mirror.